This I Know

I delivered this message at my home church Calvary Chapel International Worship on 6 September 2015. Here are my notes from that morning.

This has been a difficult message to prepare. I had written notes down earlier in the week but to be honest I did not feel committed to it yet. I have struggled with this message more than any message in recent memory. I have been writing but my ideas haven’t felt particularly inspired. Things have felt pretty dry for me. I have been trying to put my finger on it and it wasn’t until I was trying to explain my message that it hit me.

I am not ok.

There has been so much painful change in my life in the short and medium terms that I have not been able to get my feet under me. Like swimming but being unable to get a good rhythm, you know you are moving but you wonder if you are making an really progress. So what do you do when you feel like you are about to drown? The panicky answer is to start working harder.

Push Through!

Lean In.

Don’t Give Up!

Don’t Give In!

But just like that lifeguard who knows that your flailing is counterproductive, God let me tire myself out and then He reached in to save me. He reminded me of who He is and what he has done. He brought me back to my right mind the mind regenerated by him. He brought me back to his word. So I want to share that with you today.

We are going to take a look at Psalm 73 today.

Truly God is good to Israel, to those who are pure in heart.(v1)

First things first. God is Good. You have to have that settled before you even get started. That has to inform your thinking. Once I got that settled than I could examine what was really happening.

But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled, my steps had nearly slipped. For I was envious of the arrogant when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. (v2-3)

Why me God? What was I going through this pain? Why is it me in the fire? Why did they have to die? Why couldn’t it have kept going? Why won’t he talk with me? Why did the contract end? Why God? Why?

For they have no pangs until death; their bodies are fat and sleek. They are not in trouble as others are; they are not stricken like the rest of mankind. Therefore pride is their necklace; violence covers them as a garment. Their eyes swell out through fatness; their hearts overflow with follies. They scoff and speak with malice; loftily they threaten oppression. They set their mouths against the heavens, and their tongue struts through the earth. Therefore his people turn back to them, and find no fault in them. And they say, “How can God know? Is there knowledge in the Most High?” Behold, these are the wicked; always at ease, they increase in riches. (v4-12)

I mean everyone else is doing just fine. Haven’t I been following you? Haven’t I stuck it out? How come it is peaches and cream for them and bread and water for me?

All in vain have I kept my heart clean and washed my hands in innocence. For all the day long I have been stricken and rebuked every morning.(v13-14)

Didn’t I serve you enough? Didn’t I do enough? Where is my blessing?

If I had said, “I will speak thus, ”I would have betrayed the generation of your children. But when I thought how to understand this, it seemed to me a wearisome task, until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I discerned their end.(v15-17)

Prayer, Praise and Worship. This was the turning point. It reminded me that the end of my story has been written. My name is captured in the the Lamb’s book of life. That ultimate victory is mine.

Truly you set them in slippery places; you make them fall to ruin. How they are destroyed in a moment, swept away utterly by terrors! Like a dream when one awakes, O Lord, when you rouse yourself, you despise them as phantoms. (v18-20)

You have to get out of the place where your focus is on your own pain. You have to get beyond yourself. Look away from the hurt and towards God.

When my soul was embittered, when I was pricked in heart, I was brutish and ignorant; I was like a beast toward you. (v21-22)

I had to recognize that I had been lashing out at God. Striking at the Father who loves me. Pushing away the one who has loved me more than any other.

Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. (v23-24)

Despite pushing Him away he still hold onto me. He still guides me, gives me wisdom and ultimate victory.

Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. (v25-26)

When I was able to see that God was loving to me it filled me with awe. It gave me the strength to carry on. I lifted up my head to see the people around me. The more I looked the more I saw the blessings of God. He had surrounded me but I was so busy looking in that I didn’t see what he was doing.

For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you. (v27)

Then I was reminded of those who are on the outside. Those who have not heard. Those who have not seen. There are so many people who cross my path every day. They haven’t been told or if they have they haven’t been introduced.

But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all your works. (v28)

God has told me He will be with me forever. He is my strong tower. He is my refuge. He is my shield. He is mindful of a sinner like me. I want to tell everyone I can about Him. My God is amazing.